Shit!
So no one replied to my previous post.
Which means probably no one came.
So I wasted 5 hours for nothing.
Tsk what a waste of time.
Maybe I should just go private.
Life is so monotonous now.
Now that exams are over, I can't think of anything to do.
Now I feel so sian when I step into the library.
Either I can't find the book I want or I don't feel like reading it anymore immediately after borrowing it.
I feel really lazy now that I look at the piano pieces I wanted to play before the exams.
I wanted to cook lots of nice food after the exams, but after a few disappointments, I really don't have the courage to try anymore.
Pre-exams makes me excited about post-exams, but post-exams just make me really really empty.
Like studying has become my whole life, and without studying, there is nothing.
Exams suck to the core.
I can't say how disappointed I feel.
Stop treating me like I'm that kind of person.
Sometimes I wonder if you are just playing with me.
Saturdays and Sundays are just another excuse for you to trap me in the house.
I feel like a kind of mildew attached to the house, just waiting to rot.
Oh, no wait, I 'm already rotting.
My insides are rotting away, I'm becoming an empty shell.
No substance, no material, no thinking of my own.
I feel so cut off from the outside world.
I'm already a hermit before I'm ready to become one.
Can you imagine a hermit which is also a lifeless, empty puppet?
How can you do that to me?
After I sacrificed my chance for a wonderful week abroad, how can you claim that it's my own fault?
How can you keep harping on it when I did it for the sake of making ends meet?
How can you turn on me and blame me when I didn't even mention a single word about how much I actually wanted to go, how sad I was to give up the chance?
Do you know how hurt, how disappointed you made me feel?
Do you know how many tears I cried when you are not able to understand why I did this?
Why do some people live such an empty life?
Is it bestowed unto us, or are we the ones that caused it?
Why is it that the more materialistic life is, the less we enjoy it?
